If I could go back to my first semester of college, I’d tell myself a few things. 

My first week after moving into the dorms, I went straight into rush week. 1200 girls trying to get spots in sororities, knowing not everyone would end up with a spot. Immediately after that extremely stressful week, I went on a retreat for a scholarship I received, another 100 new people. Then, school started. 

I graduated with 56 people, and even if you weren’t the most active participant in high school, everyone knew you. During freshman year, 10,000 people started OU with me— no chance to even know half of them. 

Panicked, I tried to join as many things as possible. I tried to take as many classes as possible. I’ve never been more stretched than I was freshman year of school. I vividly remember thinking not going to one activity would mean I’d never make another friend. I put a lot of pressure on myself and I wish I would have stepped back and enjoyed it more. 

Knowing a couple of things would have made my experience a little bit better. Here are a couple of things I wish I knew freshman year: 

Get involved and know that there is space for you. 

There is space for you. At OU, there are something like 500 student organizations and unlimited opportunities to join them. Honestly, the sheer amount overwhelmed me. At my high school, everyone was kinda involved in everything, but at a big college, there are so many clubs, activities, and social organizations that you couldn’t even know the name of every club on campus. 

When I came to college I was concerned with finding the most important club or association, and my biggest regret freshman year was chasing esteem instead of trying to find what I actually like. I’m grateful that the pandemic, as horrendous as it was, forced me to start over with my involvement in college. 

There really is enough to go around, so do what you like and be around people that you like. Some of the activities I did freshman year were just not my people, and when I realized I could narrow my involvement to the organizations I actually cared about, I was able to fully embrace them. 

Now, I’m involved in PRSSA and my church, which is not a lot ‘on campus’ considering how many organizations some students are involved with, but I realized putting a lot of time into a couple of organizations can be more meaningful. I’m able to serve as president of our PRSSA chapter and I’m glad I have time to put my energy into it. 

During freshman year, I’d encourage you to try lots of things, but don’t feel bad moving on if it doesn’t work for you. I dropped my sorority after freshman year (a whole blog post in itself), and I’m still friends with people from it. 

If anything, get to know people, find who you belong with, and put energy toward those people. 

Know that college can be lonely, but I promise you aren’t the only one experiencing it.  

College brought out a side of me I had never experienced before. I’m one of four kids, so I’ve never been in an empty house. My grandparents would come over after school, we were good friends with my neighbors, and my family was big enough that I never was alone. 

I craved alone time in high school because I never got it, but in college, an empty dorm room felt isolating. I developed a fear of being alone, even if it was just for a few hours. 

I felt like I was the only person not out with friends. Looking back, a lot of my friends admit to experiencing loneliness during freshman year. It can be really hard to go from family dinners every night to wondering who you’re going to eat with that night. 

 Even if you’re involved, it can be hard to find the people who will be your friends in college, and while they’ll come, sometimes it takes time. 

As you start freshman year, find places to meet people and continue to pursue community, and when you experience loneliness, know that you are not alone. I promise more people are struggling with it than you think. 

Switching your major is not a sign of failure. 

While I put public relations as my major in my high school yearbook, I started school declaring International Business: Italian. I now admit switching your major is a sign of growth and evolvement. You’re not married to the career dreams of your 17-year-old self. 

Sure, go ahead and declare a major but know you might switch. I declared International Business, then English, then Nutrition, then English, and then finally I went back to Public Relations. While hectic, I’m so glad that I switched my major until I found what I really wanted to pursue. 

Don’t get to senior year and realize you don’t want to be a doctor; you’d rather be a graphic designer. I’d encourage you to take classes in multiple disciplines your freshman year or try to talk to seniors or people working in your major of choice. Keep changing, but know that it’s easier to change your first two years than your last two years. 

You don’t have to be in the party scene to find friends

I went to exactly two frat parties the first month of college, and after that, I never went back. There are a lot of things I hated (one, lots of people; two, late nights; three, too crazy). Sure, you can stay true to your morals at a frat party, but the atmosphere is (obviously) not conducive to it. 

You might feel like everyone is partying, but in my experience, there are plenty of people that don’t so if you aren’t interested, find them. College has fun experiences outside of the flashing lights and crazy drinking. Watch Gilmore Girls with the girls. Go on Braum’s dates. Campus walks. Game nights. Target runs. Movie nights. 

And luckily for anyone not interested in the party scene, it really dies a little more every year. By junior year, people focus up or at least go out a little less. 

There’s a lot of opportunity in college outside of the one scene you see in movies. And plenty of people that aren’t involved (even in a sorority). 

Finding a church can add so much to college. Try to find one you attend weekly.   

I wish I was more consistent in going to church in my college town freshman year. I went home a lot so I went to church with my family. I think that’s ok, but I regret not finding a college church home earlier. 

Now, I enjoy my church in Norman and am more consistent than I’ve ever been. It gives me a lot of peace starting the week with community worship in the place where I live. If I had that routine and consistency freshman year, I think I would have adjusted better.  

If you are starting college, just start making it a habit. I think if you can start freshman year, it’ll make a huge difference. 

Sometimes it just takes time to adjust. 

College is a really big adjustment, but by the end of freshman year or sophomore year, it’ll feel normal. And remember, everyone’s experience is different. Some people find it easy and more people find it difficult. 

Just know that whatever you’re experiencing, you are not alone. I wish I knew that my freshman year. 

I loved the first year of college and would do it again if it didn’t involve living in the dorms 🙂 But college has continued to get better and better. If your starting school in August, I hope you keep an open mind and find people you belong with.  

If you’ve already experienced freshman year, do you have any tips for current/incoming freshmen??